Untitled essay.

I had to write this short essay for English while I was on my mid-term (back home, yee!) and I actually finished it just now. The options of on what to write it weren’t really complicated but I really am awful at writing short essays (or at least essays that make sense). This one is short, boring and stupid. Enjoy!

Rain pounded powerfully the windows of the train, which moved fast through beautiful landscapes of England: green, brown and yellowish fields, deep forests, tiny villages, etc. Many reasons could make a person get on a train. Some search for other people; try to close open wounds from the past, mend mistakes… Others want to escape from someone they have left behind. Who knows, maybe that person is themselves. Two seats away from the young girl there is a woman travelling to see her mother to tell her she loves her before she exhales her last breath. Not far from her there is a young man who looks at the ground with a nostalgic look, he wants the train to bring her closer to the woman he loves.

At last, but not least, we find a girl. Her name is Alexandra, she’s twenty-three. Squeezed in her old skinny jeans and wearing a light blue jersey too thin for the British weather she looks through the window, not knowing how to feel. Her hair falls freely over her left shoulder like a golden waterfall of curls. Her skin is pale but fair, lacking any imperfection. She bites her lip, slightly purplish because of the cold, and closes her emerald-green eyes.

Her chest slowly rises, then descends gracefully with every breath she takes. She fumbles with the hem of her jersey, still biting her lip. The girl tries not to press too much or else she’ll end up bleeding like the last time she was this nervous. She opens her eyes and tilts her head to the side, softly resting it against the nearly-frozen window.

Soon the train approaches a stop, Alexandra doesn’t pay much attention to the name of the city, and she doesn’t care where to get off. That’s one of the main advantages of running away. The train finally stops in a small station. She watches a kid run laughing to the exit, followed by a short ginger woman holding the hand of a little girl, also ginger. The little girl smiles glowingly, just as if it was Christmas morning. The doors open and the three of them hop off, Alexandra watches amused as a tall dark-haired man hugs the two kids and then kisses the woman.

Alexandra wonders if that could have been her in some years. Of course, her children would probably have had bright blonde hair, but that’s not the point. Who knows, maybe there’s a chance she could have had two beautiful children like she always dreamed of when she was seven. The girl sighs because of this. She was so naïve back then. Thinking that her life would turn out the way it did in those fairy-like Disney movies.

It is actually funny because when she turned 15 she went through this feminist I-don’t-need-men-in-my-life phase. She used to go around preaching that women were free, which of course they were, and that they were better off with men. Oh the irony, eight years later she finds herself in a train with an unknown destination because of a man.

“I wish I had listened” she tells herself as the train speeds up. If she had listened then she wouldn’t be seating in that damned train. If she had listened she would probably be studying in college to have a successful career. If only, if only. But now it’s too late, she can’t go back, even if she wishes she could. So many times has she wished to time-travel to mend mistakes.

The train now quickly moves through a beautiful deciduous forest. If there is one thing Alexandra truly loves it is autumn. Nothing can be compared to the beauty of seeing those green leaves perfectly blending with the autumn-y ones that have turned brown or yellow. Since she was a little kid she’s loved to stomp on leaves and hear them crack and break beneath her feet. The girl opens the window a bit to let some air come in; she closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. It smells like it has just rained and it reminds her of home. Or what she used to call ‘home’. A shiver runs through her spine as she is filled with nostalgia.

After a few seconds she slowly opens her eyes, closes the window and rubs her upper arms, England might be gorgeous but it sure is chilly. She glances for a second at a man a few seats away from her. He looks about 30, with hazel short hair and carrying a small bag with him. But Alexandra is not interested in what he looks like, she reads a sticker stuck to his bag “Home is where the heart is”. The girl can’t avoid grinning. Then where is her heart if she doesn’t have a place to call home? She lightly chuckles as she answers herself “Oh yeah, I have been assured I don’t have a heart several times earlier today”.

The moment when he told her she didn’t have a heart felt unreal. She thought of how all the most beautiful things can be broken so easily. Especially when it comes to feelings and relationships. There is no use in kissing toads, blue princess don’t exist. Only foolish people oblivious of the consequences some actions have.

Alexandra looked down at her hands, thinking of that same morning. She remembered well the moment when he yelled those two words, “It’s over”. It felt nothing but horrible. She had created this glass ball around herself and her world. Then it shattered in a billion pieces that cut her like a knife tears a piece of fabric. It was then when she realized it was true that she didn’t have a heart, because if had crashed down like her glass ball.

The girl blinked several times to try and avoid the tears from filling her already watered eyes. Then she realized the train had stopped at a station and there was no one in it anymore. A man dressed in a dark uniform and wearing a bright yellow waistcoat came in and told her it was the last station and she had to get off.

Alexandra did as she was told, she quickly grabbed the only bag she had brought with her and hopped off the train. As it left the station with a loud noise of its engine the girl heard a tiny noise. Then she looked down and saw the diamond ring. He had insisted she should keep it as “a reminder of what a heartless failure she was”. That had been really considerate of him, she thought, obviously being sarcastic.

She lifted her head from the ground after picking the ring and looked around. A huge white sign on a tall post read “Yorkshire”.  She walked towards the exit of the station, no one was ever going to find her hear. Well, she guessed no one would really look for her. For one second she questioned if after everything that had happened she would find the start of a new life here of a way to end her wrecked one. It didn’t take her long to decide.


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